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Month: April 2020

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You Are Not Alone

You Are Not Alone

There Is Someone Who Understands

As a client advocate at Alcove Health, a follow-up call with a client can be filled with joyous news or laden with the sadness that comes with the knowledge that a life will never be lived on earth. We often think the latter is associated with abortion. We also serve women who valiantly overcome tough odds and are looking forward to bringing life into the world.

This week during a quiet moment in the day I sat down to check in with our precious women. I called one of our carry-to-term clients, Maria, only to hear on the other end of the line a nervous “hello”. Her English was broken, but there was no mistaking the sound of fear and anguish in her voice.

I felt instantly that I was her lifeline and knew that I needed to carefully listen to every syllable she uttered.
Maria went on to tell me that she had been experiencing unsettling signs earlier in the week and went to the emergency room. Once there, doctors told her that there was nothing that could be done to sustain her pregnancy and sent her back home with instructions to navigate through a miscarriage. She was explaining to me the process that she had been working through and all I could think about were the notes on her case that I had refreshed my mind with before calling. She just went through this same thing last year.
I felt instantly that I was her lifeline and knew that I needed to carefully listen to every syllable she uttered.

Maria seemed to calm down as I shared that we have resources to help her work through the days to come. Someone who understands.

* Name changed to protect our client’s identity

Stephanie Meitz, Senior Client Advocate

April 21, 2020

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The Return Ultrasound

The Return Ultrasound

Where One Heartbeat Changes Hearts Forever

It was what we call a “return ultrasound” appointment. A week earlier Jada came to her first appointment without the father of the baby, received a consultation and pregnancy test and was now returning for an ultrasound. This time, though, he came with her.

Jada, certain an abortion was her best choice, was now returning with the father, who she didn’t even want included in the first appointment.

The ultrasound revealed she was quite a bit further along than she expected to be. A clear image of a definite baby. The couple was quiet, but not upset. There were some tears, but not of despair, more of awe. Later, as I thought about it, it seemed to be a sacred awe. One that feels like fear, but weighs like a privilege.

Afterwards, in the consultation room for another consult, both Jada and the father of the baby stated similar sentiments: overwhelmed, with a mixture of fear and excitement. The father spoke of wanting to do this right.

“I have a great program I want to tell you about, Dad,” I say to the young man, planning to tell him about a local program just for Dads.

He exhales and smiles. “Wow, you called me ‘Dad.’ That’s the first time anyone has ever said that to me.”

It was a word that rolled off my tongue quickly, but a word he clearly felt very deeply. “I’m going to call them as soon as we leave here,” he said of the program for Dads.

A man, coming in just to see an ultrasound image, leaving with the weight and honor of fatherhood. It was a good day.

* Name changed to protect our client’s identity

Sherri Pigue, Client Advocate

Sherri Pigue, Client Relations Manager

April 20, 2020

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The Best Gift

The Best Gift

A Safe Space to Process Your Feelings

Going through any crisis can leave one frazzled and in need of reassurance. What if you add an unplanned pregnancy and a pandemic into the mix? Here at Alcove Health, we are meeting women daily who are living this reality.

Recently I met with Ava, a young mom contemplating an abortion to end her unplanned pregnancy. One of the first statements she made to me was:

“I was sitting in the parking lot at the abortion clinic crying so hard. I just knew that I didn’t belong there. It just didn’t feel right. So, I looked online and found Alcove Health.”

Shyly she sat down, quieted her nerves, and began to tell me that she is a single mom with two daughters who depend on her. Ava had just lost her second job when Covid-19 struck and has no family to help her, only a lifelong friend who is solely encouraging her to hang in there. Ava shared with me that she is desperate to do better than her mother did and be a good example for her girls. Berating herself for a “moment in time” her heartbreaking story continued. I was honored to listen and share these moments with her knowing God was present with us in the room.

A smile and many tissues later, I was able to tell her that she has already given her children a better life than she had. I told her that she is not alone. There is a community standing by you and rooting for you to have the future that you have fought so hard for.

Ava breathed a sigh of relief and said, “This feels so good, you know? Just having the chance to hear myself say this out loud and uninterrupted is the best gift. Thank You. I needed this more than you know.”

* Name changed to protect our client’s identity

Stephanie Meitz, Senior Client Advocate

April 19, 2020

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Dismantling the Walls

Dismantling the Walls

“So shall My word be that goes forth from My mouth; It shall not return to Me void, But it shall accomplish what I please, And it shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.” Isaiah 55:11​

Abuse. Neglect. Drug addiction. Scary and sad words that are spoken all too often in the consultation room. How does a child cope with such a home? Some build a wall. Not a physical wall, of course, but an invisible one. One that protects a fragile mind from the full range of emotions that would normally flow from such an environment. Many learn to cope with the help of the wall. Some find the wall a continued source of protection and comfort as they transition into adulthood and face new challenges. This was Kristen’s experience. Somehow, by the grace of a God who she did not know, she was able to forgive and could even speak kindly of her parents. Yet the wall was still intact, helping Kristen cope with the stress of an unplanned pregnancy.

This was not her first time facing this situation. 

Kristen had a history of pregnancies, some ended in abortion, some had ended in miscarriage, one even ending in the life she now calls “daughter”.

She knew the wall was there. Kristen spoke of her lack of ability to feel emotion, she spoke of her logical, left-brain that helped her think about her situation in an objective manner. It was those attributions that allowed Kristen to divorce the feelings she has for her daughters from the feelings she might have for her unborn child. Kristen recognized the inconsistencies in her thought process, but she had come to love the wall and wasn’t about to abandon it in the midst of a crisis.

Like many of our clients, Kristen had a Grandma who loved Jesus and a mom who found Him useful sometimes during her journey to healing. But Kristen rejected the idea and instead chose to think of God as a force. And that was understandable. When a person has suffered much at the hands of those who are supposed to love and protect them, the concept of a loving and gracious Heavenly Father can be hard to grasp. But Kristen was open and allowed us to share the Gospel with her.

Kristen listened intently and even asked some questions. Was the wall coming down? Only our Lord knows. But by the end of her consult, Kristen was beginning to see that this wall wasn’t such a great help after all. 

Kristen affirmed the need for counseling, and even more surprisingly, she accepted a copy of the Jesus Storybook Bible to read to her daughter. Our Lord is the only one who knows his plans for Kristen and the life she is carrying. But one thing we do know, His Word never returns void and so we rejoice for every opportunity we have to share his great love for sinners like Kristen. For sinners like you. For sinners like me.

* Name changed to protect our client’s identity

Sheri Coker, Senior Client Advocate

April 14, 2020

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Care Net Peninsula is a 501(c)3 non-profit. We provide the help and hope local women need to choose life for their baby.

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