As a client advocate at Alcove Health, a follow-up call with a client can be filled with joyous news or laden with the sadness that comes with the knowledge that a life will never be lived on earth. We often think the latter is associated with abortion. We also serve women who valiantly overcome tough odds and are looking forward to bringing life into the world.
This week during a quiet moment in the day I sat down to check in with our precious women. I called one of our carry-to-term clients, Maria, only to hear on the other end of the line a nervous “hello”. Her English was broken, but there was no mistaking the sound of fear and anguish in her voice.
I felt instantly that I was her lifeline and knew that I needed to carefully listen to every syllable she uttered.
Maria went on to tell me that she had been experiencing unsettling signs earlier in the week and went to the emergency room. Once there, doctors told her that there was nothing that could be done to sustain her pregnancy and sent her back home with instructions to navigate through a miscarriage. She was explaining to me the process that she had been working through and all I could think about were the notes on her case that I had refreshed my mind with before calling. She just went through this same thing last year.
Praying softly while I listened, I gently told her, “You are not alone. I am so grateful that you answered my call today and I am here to listen to you.”
Maria seemed to calm down as I shared that we have resources to help her work through the days to come. Someone who understands.
The couple was quiet, but not upset. There were some tears, but not of despair, more of awe. Later, as I thought about it, it seemed to be a sacred awe. One that feels like fear, but weighs like a privilege.
Many learn to cope with the help of walls they have built. We often come face to face with those walls in consultations. Sheri gives us a look into one of her encounters with a mom who was finally starting to bring those walls down.